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Fawlty Towers TV quotes

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Just after Basil gets the duck from Andre, he tells Manuel to get the trolley. Basil then walks into the door, and the duck goes flying. You can briefly see the arm of the crewman holding the door closed. A few seconds later, Manuel comes through the door and stands on the duck. For about 5 seconds you can see the crewman's face. See more...

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For one episode, the props guy spent ages building up the bottom of a frying pan with cotton wool and padding, then painting it black to look right. It was placed on a shelf just inside the kitchen door. Unfortunately, on the night, John Cleese reached around the door frame without looking and picked up the wrong frying pan. He then hit Andrew Sachs very hard over the head with it, almost knocking the poor man out. See more...

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Communication Problems (a.k.a. Theft) (series 2)

Basil: A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.

The Germans (series 1)

Basil: Don't mention the war. I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it all right.

Basil: Is something wrong?

German guest: Will you please stop talking about the war?

Basil: Me? You started it.

German guest: We did not.

Basil: Yes you did, you invaded Poland.

Communication Problems (a.k.a. Theft) (series 2)

Mrs Richards: And another thing. I expect to be able to see the sea.

Basil: [whispering to Manuel] Deaf, Mad and Blind. [To Mrs Richards] Yes, this is the view as far as I can remember... yes, yes it is.

Mrs Richards: When I pay for a view, I expect something more interesting than that.

Basil: But that is Torquay, madam.

Mrs Richards: Well it's not good enough.

Basil: Well may I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window? Sydney Opera House perhaps? The Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically across the plain...

Mrs Richards: [interrupting] Don't be silly. I expect to be able to see the sea.

Basil: You CAN see the sea! It's over there between the land and the sky!

Mrs Richards: I'd need a telescope to see that.

Basil: Well might I suggest you move to a hotel closer to the sea. Or preferably in it.

Mrs Richards: Now listen to me. I'm not satisified but I've decided to stay. HOWEVER, I shall expect a deduction.

Basil: Why, because Krakatoa isn't erupting at the moment?

Mrs Richards: Because the room is cold, the bath is too small, the view is invisible and the radio doesn't work.

Basil: No, the radio works. You don't.

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